Ven Dhammasami, Retreats & Thai Restaurants ~ by Ven. Candā
Never a dull day passes at Anukampa Grove ~ unless, that is, one may consider our weekly silent meditation days dull. For me, those “stoppings” are deeply relished as we enter the busiest time of our years’ cycle ~ demanding of energy yet benevolently serenaded by birdsong and the rustling of delicate new leaves.
My main activities have included organising the upcoming tours for Ajahn Brahm, newsletter composition, creating a colourful new leaflet with (the now) An. Chie, updating our visitors guidelines with An. Upacalaa, and excitingly, (very lightly) assisting Erik in producing an Anukampa Podcast channel! When not standing at the computer desk, I am of course mentoring my new anagarikaas, and introducing them to the various aspects of the project including how Mailchimp, our bookings systems and website’s events pages work. And, of course, how to keep a large white robe on one’s shoulders!
Quiet meditation, Dhamma inspiration and lots of laughter is our fuel, and our visitors ~ those who drop by and those who stay for a while ~ bring richness, learning and the warm spirit of service. Torben, one of my very first non-Indian, non-Nepali teachers in the Goenka tradition, stayed for two full days, with a mission to pressure wash the entire sandstone patio which had become quite slippery over many years. Task completed, he gave our conservatory (walking meditation room) a thorough hose down too! The tile shade has brightened many tones and everything looks sparklingly new.
April brought the special gift of Sayadaw K Dhammasami’s visit to the UK from Myanmar. Formerly known as “Oxford Sayadaw” he is generally based in Myanmar at the International Buddhist University of the Shan State. He was across for just two weeks, which included teaching in Hungary and Gloucestershire, so the two meetings we had felt all the more precious. The first was his impromptu visit for tea at Anukampa Grove, accompanied by Ven Pannyavamso. The first thing Sayadaw wanted to do was have a photo taken under our gorgeous blossoming cherry tree ~ and who can blame him?!
After some Dhamma conversation over tea, with deep sincerity Sayadaw said that he felt “much much mudita (rejoicing or altruistic joy) for the hard work and efforts that have gone into our monastery.” As a touching gesture, he gave then anagarikaa-to-be Chie the small rosary he had carried with him and said with a twinkle in his eyes that the next time he visits he will listen to her Dhamma Talk…who knows?
The next week, I had the blessing of an hours’ Dhamma discussion with Sayadaw at Oxford Buddha Vihara (just 10 mins by taxi) centering on mudita, his main practice, and the insights it brings into non-self. Hearing how he applies mudita not only on the cushion but in developing student centred education ~ using mudita to develop positive empathy, disrupt top down models, instill a spirit of enquiry and heal trauma ~ was extremely inspiring and profound. When a person who lives in the most volatile of situations says: “there is a choice ~ you can focus on what is wrong in the world or look at what is beautiful and good,” it hits deeply. And to prove the integrity of his practice and humanity, his philosophy extends to his views about bhikkhunis. When I asked him his perspective he made three salient points:
1.He was at the Hamburg conference 2007 and realised that its not an academic problem but one of institutional tradition
2. You can be part of the problem or the solution and he wanted, in “whatever small ways he could,” to be part of the solution
3. It would be a loss for Oxford if I left and this is where I belong 🙂
In these three simple eloquent ways this noble-hearted monk expressed compassion, wisdom and spiritual integrity and I realised he had a lot to do with me being here. The first time we met, in 2019, he told his supporters who were present that he’s “rooting for me to stay in Oxford” which felt supremely welcoming. And here we are, happily abiding near Oxford, with good monastic friends just a short drive away at the Oxford Buddha Vihara 🙂
Other notable visitors of late have included Venerable Vimala (they/them) of Tilorien Monastery, Belgium, who it was a delight to spend sisterly time with. No one understands a bhikkhuni quite like a bhikkhuni, and our paths have been running parallel and interconnecting for decades. We met on a Goenka retreat in 2000 and subsequently both started bhikkhuni monasteries in our home countries. Within the week that they were here, they painted two bathrooms walls in cheery colours, plus diagnosed ~ and provided possible solutions for ~ many of our heating issues!
We also hosted two women from South-East Asia, who flew all the way from Singapore and Malaysia respectively to practice with us for a while. Even in their home countries, there seems to be a lack of bhikkhuni monasteries for them to practice in, hence they travelled so far to be here. With all these budding nuns and only five bedrooms we will be full for aspirants in no long time and may (entually) need to send some of our metta-full home-grown nuns “outwards and unbounded” in the way true metta spreads, to plant more monastery seeds.
We have had a few big dana gatherings too. A UK-based Sri Lankan group who said they have been following us for many years offered a lovely lunch and impressed me with their knowledge of and respect for bhikkhunis. Long term supporter Amalsha (with her friend) was also present that day. If you have been following us for a while, you may remember that Amalsha kindly stored our retreat mats for many years at her home, before we got a base with storage space. It has been so satisfying to to meet her and other good friends like Hiranthi, Samantha, Paul and Richard again recently and be able to show them around the beautiful house and grounds that they helped bring into being.
Last but not least, a big shout out to our local Thai supporters, Mali, Mukh and Achala. Mali invited me and all my visitors to her Thai restaurant, in nearby Eaton village for Songkran, Thai New Year ~ and put on a feast. As her friends said “Mali does not know how to do small!” After a delicious meal at The Eight Bells, we were invited to participate in the traditional water ceremony which involves chanting blessings whilst having water poured over our hands, which we then splash on those willing!
This was our first invitation to a Thai restaurant and we are very grateful to Mali for making it so special.
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